Why I, Donald Trump, fired James Comey, FBI Director
I fired James Comey, not a day too soon
He is a “showboat”, “nut-job” and a “grand stander”
No one should dare out “showboat” me
I am the ultimate “show-boat” grandeur
I invited him for a nice dinner
at the White House, one evening
I asked him for an oath of loyalty
He had the galls to say nothing doing
He said that he would be honest with me
This “honest Abe” routine pissed me off very very bad
How dare he not know that I am the boss
His response made me very very angry and mad
Also, I asked him to drop the investigation of Flynn
I told him “I hope you can see your way clear
to letting Flynn go, He is a good guy”
He didn’t say yes and thereby risked his career
I know, I know, as a candidate I loudly praised Comey
Back then, his actions helped my candidacy
You better believe it, I really meant every word of it
But, his actions now are hurting my Presidency
Comey’s penchant for publicity
Has damaged the FBI
He had to go, and go NOW
To fix FBI, we need a new guy
The FBI has been in turmoil for a year
I know it, you know it and every one knows it
Comey left the department in tumult
In my administration, he was not a good fit
How dare Comey reject my claim
that Obama had bugged Trump Tower
Asking FBI to back-up my assertion
is only fair, and is not an abuse of power
Looking into Russian connections to my campaign
is a gross waste of tax payers’ money
Still, I am not trying to stop it (at least publicly)
I know that I’m not under investigation personally
This Russia thing involving Trump and Russia
is a made up story; there is no smoking gun
It’s an excuse by the Democrats who lost
an election that they should have won
It feels good to use my pet phrase – “You are fired”
This POTUS job is a difficult one, I must say
Can you believe it, I have been busier than ever
It is all work work work, little time for play
(weekends in Mar-a-Lago don’t count)
I know the dishonest media is very very busy
trying to spin Comey’s firing into a fake story
They think I fired Comey because he was
getting uncomfortably close to stealing my glory
The firings of Preet Bharara, Sally Yates and now James Comey
are not coincidences; they’re all a part of the plan
No one should stop me from Making America Great Again
I can only trust the members of my own clan
As the President, I don’t need to justify my actions
I can do whatever I want, no room for any questioning
I ordered Rosenstein to write a memo & he duty fully complied
I didn’t really need the memo, it was only a “window-dressing”
(I learned this from Putin – the lucky bastard)
This Rosenstein guy is smarter than Comey
He understands his role, his duty & his mission
Which is to serve and protect the President
There can be no misunderstanding of my position
The firing has nothing to do with Comey and Hillary
That is just a diversion, misdirection, a ruse
to distract fake media and pathetic critics
Actually, I loved it when Comey made Hillary sing the blues!
I sent my underlings out to spin on my behalf
This includes the Vice President Mike Pence too
Then I pulled the rug out from them
They were left holding a shoe!
(Ha, Ha, Ha, this job is so much fun!)
With lot of things happening, my surrogates
can’t be expected to provide accurate information
Playing fast and loose with truth has worked for me
I am hard to be pinned down for any of my positions
(I love to see the reaction of fake media and pathetic critics)
My Congressional Republican partners in crime
Dutifully echo my talking points & story line
Owl face McConnell, & baby face Ryan know
without my support, they will not reach the finish line
You know I am a uuuuge reality TV star
“You are fired” is my trade mark phrase
Now I am the host of the biggest reality show on Earth
I am owed nothing but unmitigated praise
(You are fired, you are fired, you are fired – boy I love this phrase)
With new leadership at FBI
We will be bringing the investigation
to a swift close, mark my words
No more charade or futile exploration
And we will fulfill the promise
I made to Make America Great Again
The journey will be tough, we know
But these efforts will not go in vain.
God Bless America
The Land I love
I guide her from the White House
With a shining light from Above!
_________________________________________________________
Now let me share a secret with you
The real reason I fired Comey is very simple
He was getting too close to spilling beans
His persistence on the Russia investigation
Had to be stopped by any means
(So I fired him – I am the boss!)
I didn’t seek any one else’s advice or comment
I am the boss; I know what I needed to do
I surrounded the firing with misleading statements
This type of action is totally within my purview
(Do I need to remind you that I am the President!)
People who work for me
Need to do what I ask them to do
To act otherwise, is insubordination
Not different from Captain’s orders to his crew.
I am the Boss. Period.